World Domination Quest
by Crazycakes
Summary: The homeless (and the not-so-homeless) are set to take over anything and everything. From grocery stores to random street corners, they'll be looking for members to recruit to their team. And they want you.
1. Market Trek

I was bored in class a few days from Halloween, and I wrote this. I'm thinking I might actually continue this one- I like the plot.  
  
World Domination Quest  
  
by HikariEryaviel  
  
Once upon a time in a land far away, there lived a bum. This was a very rich bum. He even owned a bookstore. He was a rather clean looking bum (compared to other bums, at least), and this bum, just so you know, is evil. He is very evil. He's the best evil person in the world, next to the boogyman. He thrives on people's pain, and he wants to take over the world!  
  
...However, since he was technically a bum, this wasn't possible. So he decided to take over the local grocery store instead. It was easier than the world, thats for sure.   
  
But this evil bum, his name was...Otogi.  
  
Otogi was currently walking around the supermarket, plotting the next phase of his plan. So far, all he had managed to do was spill salsa down his shirt. But no matter! Salsa is good for you!  
  
Otogi was clad in all black, with a hood, gloves and a Jason mask to fit. Some people may have thought this strange, but he only got a few semi-interested looks from passerby.   
  
But considering it was Halloween, he didn't really stand out much.   
  
He ran past the fruits and veggies isle, and found some yummy kiwi fruit. He was going to use them to throw at old ladies. He ran to the other side of the store, and ducked behind a Spam-can pyramid.   
  
He saw an old lady walk by, so he positioned himself where he could see her. He aimed the kiwi carefully, and threw it!  
  
...He missed.  
  
Instead of hitting her head, like he wanted the fruit to, it fell right in the plastic bag she was holding. She looked suprised at first, but then turned around and smiled.   
  
In a croaky old voice, she started to talk calmly to him. Quite the opposite of what he expected her to do. "Why thank you young man! I needed some kiwi, and it would'a taken me forever to walk to the other side of the store. What a nice boy you are!"  
  
Otogi 'hmphed' and walked away. He kept looking down the isles, until he found one where it looked like an employee was trying to get bags off of a shelf. Bags of candy.  
  
She saw him and gave him a pleading look. "Can you please help me? I want to get home so I can go trick-or-treating with my kids!"   
  
Bum-boy just smirked. What, help you do THIS?!" Then he pulled a bunch of bags down from the shelf and ripped then open, spilling the candy everywhere.  
  
"Yes, thank you! We're having a special in the candy isle, and when ever someone walks by, they can pick up a piece of candy. This will make it so much eaisier!" And she ran off to find her kids.   
  
...Being evil was way too annoying. 


	2. Branch Money

It was a dark night on which it happened. The storm outside was unleashing its fury   
  
on the residents of Domino, dousing the wandering souls that were unfortunate enough to get   
  
caught outside. Poor homeless people.  
  
Not that society cares anyways. Sure, bunches of people give them money, but it's   
  
not like it really helps. I mean, all they do is buy pot and beer with it! Why don't they   
  
give them something useful? Like a hotel room for the night? Now that would be useful! But   
  
nooooo. Everyone is too lazy to do something like that! Now, because everyone gives them   
  
money, they probably _own_ the hotels! It's no wonder we're all screwed; our society is run   
  
by bums!  
  
Speaking of trashy people, we now go to a secluded area of the park, where Seto   
  
Kaiba is counting his money. He was currently wearing what looked like a torn up blanket, no   
  
shoes, and it looked like he had just recently been acquainted with a pile of mud. But,   
  
despite his appearance, he was as happy as could be, just sitting there, humming to himself   
  
and flipping through his large wad of cash.  
  
You see, Seto Kaiba was a part-time bum. He still had Kaiba Corp., of course, but   
  
his greedy little mind decided that he wasn't getting enough money from the bajillion-dollar   
  
company, so he decided to take up another form of occupation.  
  
Of course, what better to do than sit on a curb all day, getting free money from   
  
random passerby? Seto Kaiba enjoyed this job very much. Well, of course he did. Who doesn't   
  
like free money? He had got the idea for his part-time job from Yami Bakura. The yami   
  
decided that he was getting to old to steal things, and didn't want to ruin his perfect body   
  
by running from old hags with guns. He also gave up his goal on acquiring all of the Sennen   
  
items once he realized that they obviously didn't like him, and refused to be in his   
  
possession. Especially the Tauk. The two were rivals like nothing anyone had ever seen   
  
before. However, this was beside the point.  
  
Seto Kaiba was now a stinking-rich bum. And soon, he would become King of all Bums,   
  
and he would take over the world! That Yugi would pay for defeating him all of those times!   
  
He would finally be all-powerful, and he'd have the scum of the Earth obeying his every   
  
whim! The world would be covered in grease and slime and dirt, and no one would be able to   
  
do anything about it! Because he would be their leader, and he would always be obeyed!  
  
Seto Kaiba laughed softly from his perch on the tree branch. They would see who he   
  
really was! They would all be under his command soon!  
  
The homeless were about to go postal. 


End file.
